The Other Woman

I've been the other woman more times than I would like to count. Funny thing is I've never done so intentionally. Many of these men will fall into categories that will have me blogging about them in more detail later. Well as soon as I figure out how to tell their stories tactfully, but in detail as I happen to be friends with a few of their girlfriends or wives now. Shout out to my girls if you're reading you know who you are.

I've dated guys with another girlfriend, I've dated guys with wives and I even dated a guy who had about five or six girlfriends. With some I saw the signs and others I was totally blindsided. Like with the hairstylist/military man whose wife so lovingly called me on thanksgiving to tell me of her existence and then again a month ago to ask if I gave her a special gift that doesn't go away. It wasn't me so I guess I wasn't the only other woman there either. I fell in love with him instantly. We talked about marriage, what we would name our kids, the works. I had no idea there was someone else. Or I guess that I was the someone else. I had even asked him a million times over if he was married or had ever been and he sincerely said no every time.

Anyways the point of this blog wasn't to go into detail about all the men I've loved who loved someone else, we'd be here too damn long, but instead it was to discuss a new situation I've found myself in. I was approached by someone I've been seeing around for a long time. Not my usual type, but someone who makes me feel beautiful when he looks at me. We've been talking and both of us are pretty crushed out. Then out of the blue he says to me...So you know I have a long time girlfriend right? He tells me it's no secret and it's a wide known fact. My heart dropped into my stomach. Here is this dude who has been giving me butterflies something wicked and seems to really dig me and he's got a girlfriend and kids at home.

Now to me if a man chooses to go outside of the home that's on him, but I've still never purposefully allowed myself to be the other woman. I have rules about not opening your legs to another woman's man because the karma from that is gonna get you yours and you wouldn't want some woman doing that to you.

Problem is. I don't think I wanna follow my rules this time. What's wrong with me that has me thinking like that. Aren't there any single, respectful, sexy black men out there that want me so I don't have to date one that's already taken? Why is it that when he tells me it's not just sexual and acts like I'm different than the other groupie girls he meets that I actually believe him? Why is it that he loves the way I same his name and that I can't stop saying it, thinking it or wanting to whisper it in his ear? Damn it's a good name too...I'd tell ya if this wasn't a big secret. Guess it's not that secret since I kissed him at his place of employment around people who know us because I didn't know he couldn't be mine.

Do I just want him because I can't have him? But isn't it having him in a way if he isn't fully with her? What's a girl to do? It's not as cut and dry and just walk away because you know it's gonna end badly. It's not as easy as do the right thing. This guy. He sees me already. In just a short amount of time he told me the things he likes about me and they're all the things I forgot I liked about me, but keep saying are what makes me an amazing woman.

Guess it'll make great blog material if nothing else. I'll keep you posted my loves.